Tuesday, July 19, 2011

I've Got A Feeling...Thank Fuck Its Over

Humans of the world rejoice today is a great day in music as we will no longer have to hear new songs from the band some have loved and others have tried to figure out why. The Black Eyed Peas are no longer together after reading this article on stuff I was pleased that the one of the worst bands making music was to no be making the most literal and stupid songs out there.

With classic shitty songs like Lets Get It Started and I've Got A Feeling they certainly built a following for people that needed their music spelt out to them kind of like how normal people talk to their dumb friend cause he doesn't understand something really simple. You know that condescending slow retarded voice people do? yeah thats what its like.

I used to think about what songs we might next get from the BEP and started making song name suggestions just incase they ran out of ideas. Songs titles like "I just had a shower and now I'm clean" or something else like "I went in the snow and it was cold". I feel like its just too easy to just make up really dumb song names for these guys so I'm going to attempt sopme lyrics for when they inevitably get back together.

The song shall be titled: I Was Running Out Of Gas, So I Filled Up The Tank (Full Tank)

The music video shall feature Fergie wearing very little (it wasn't my choice but she never wears much does she?) driving a convertible with Will in the passenger seat. They notice low gas so pull into a gas station and the song begins...

Will: Yo yo guurrrl can you believe what I see/
low, low gas how can this be?/
So pull into the station to get this tank full/
then fly down the highway cause its what we do/

Fergie: Fly? Fly Will? we can't do that/
we driving not flying, but this car will go fast/

(more verses needed but its hard to take seriously)
Low gas sucks, I wish it weren't true/
but we are BEP and richer than you/
So we go into the station and fill it up full

fill it/
fill it/
fill it up full

Obviously it needs a bit of work, but its nothing the creative minds of Black Eyed Peas (lol) couldn't turn into a radio masterpiece and in turn club anthem. They have certainly left an annoying mark in the music carpet, you know when you try everything to get it out and yet theres still a little bit left that won't go away.

But in an attempt to wrap this shit up, the Black Eyed Peas leaving us is something that is truly great, god damn the thought of them making more rediculously literal music that is unavoidable is a scary thought. The band blew every step of the way and thankfully people will probably stop listening to them in a few months like most commercial bands do after they stop releasing stuff.

So to end this poor attempt in music blogging I end with this classic BEP line "Bob your head like epilepsy, up inside your club or in your Bentley. Get messy, loud and sick."

God Damn.

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